Bend over and let one rip!

Spirited and I finished our first Kindermusik class this summer. There's a point in the class that's quiet time - where you are supposedly teaching the kids how to rest. The teacher puts on this relaxing flute music and everyone quiets down by rocking or laying on the floor. Somehow I always end up whistling, but I digress...Spirited and I were hanging out and she was practicing sitting (one of her new favorite things to do). All of a sudden she lets one rip! The teacher looks over at me and sweetly asks, "do you have gas?" I wasn't sure who she was asking - me or Spirited. To be fair, it was loud, long, and didn't smell pretty - an adult size emission. Perhaps because of this, I wanted to distance myself from any notions that I owned that glorious fart. I quietly said, "yeah, she does." Then, because she already has my back, Spirited leaned over, kind of grunted, and let another one rip. This was starting to draw attention. I cheerfully said, "excuse us" and tried to act natural. She let one more out before the flutes were done, and I just smiled it away.

target on our backs

Recently we were in the bookstore with Spirited, who was asleep in the stroller and being watched by Cowboy. After a few minutes of browsing in an area away from them, I heard her cry. After she cried for a little bit, I started back towards them to see if I could help. There was a man standing there jingling his keys in front of her face. He seemed very nice. I took over and let Cowboy browse.
As we were walking home, Spirited started crying again. As we stopped to soothe her, Cowboy said sarcastically, "if only someone was here to tell us what to do!" (Apparently, he has been feeling harassed by well-meaning people who have offered their unsolicited advice on how to handle a baby.)
The funny thing is that men (for good or bad) seem to get advice with an attitude of "poor dear, he doesn't know any better" to go with it. Women seem to get it with a more judgmental attitude. At the same time, women can be incredibly supportive, and other parents often offer conspiratorial smiles. It's interesting how carting a child around opens you up to conversations you aren't expecting with people you wouldn't normally talk to. It's a good equalizer.

Hey, fake legs are expensive!

While out for a stroll the other day, we saw a guy directing a driver into a parking spot. The unusual part about this story is that the guy who was directing the driver was IN the empty space, sitting on the car that was behind the car backing in. We watched as the director kept telling the driver to come back. We grew more and more anxious as the car followed his direction to close the gap between the back bumper and the director's knee. As we feared, the car soon smashed the man's knee between the bumper and the other car. Before we could muster a proper response, the director looked over at us, smiled, and gave us a wink.